Hey there!
It’s Gus. (yeah,
the dog)
Mama has been
telling me all week how I should be thankful…thankful I’m alive, thankful I’m
cute, and really thankful she hasn’t killed me. So, with that in mind, I had her write this
post on my behalf.
Gus arrives at Homestead Hill |
For those of you
who don’t know me, allow me to introduce myself. I am Gus, the Great Pyrenees puppy who joined
the farm team last September after the passing of Jed (the first Great
Pyrenees). I was born last July, I weigh
in at about 100 pounds and I am still learning the whole guard dog routine. Ellie Mae is my longsuffering teacher-dog and
mentor. We make a pretty good team.
This whole deal
about being thankful started some time ago.
You know, it’s really hard for a dog to know what NOT to eat around
here. I mean, the sheep make these tasty
little raisin things, but Mama hollers when I eat them and then try to kiss
her. The chicken pen could really use a
good cleaning, but when Ellie and I start digging around and eating that stuff,
the Boss always shoos us out.
And, I
really don’t know what her hang-up is about those plastic tray things. I mean, she has a bazillion of them, does it
really matter if I chew one up once in a while?
He fusses a lot whenever I take the nearly empty cat food cans out of
the barn for some extra cleaning. And, when I haul big sticks out of the burn
pile, or out of the woodpile, someone is sure to yell at me. I thought they'd forgotten the dryer vent incident
...and there are plenty of flowers, so what if I ate one (or two)?
Anyway, there was
this little black plastic thingy hanging from the trailer. It kept blowing in the breeze and just looked
like it might be rather tasty. You know
chewing on black plastic has been shown to help dogs avoid tartar build-up on
their teeth…really…I’m sure. So, I bit
it. Then, I pulled on it. Before I knew it, the little black plastic
thingy was in a million pieces. I had
one in my mouth when Mama came outside for the day. I showed it to her, I thought she would
appreciate my interest in dental hygiene.
She started fussing. I led her to the trailer…she fussed some
more. She got the Boss and HE
fussed. Who knew that the little black
plastic thingy (that tasted SO good) was the wire to the market trailer lights? …and it would have to be repaired before
Market? Oops (and I forgot that I had already jumped all over the side of the truck with dirty feet while trying to capture a cat) Double Oops!
Such a little thing...why the big deal? |
I swear there was something on top of that truck! |
Then, a couple of
weeks ago, they were getting ready for Market when I showed them the ‘possum
Ellie and I had captured in the night.
It wasn’t quite dead, but we had really done a number on it. They took a
look at it, but weren’t too impressed.
After the Boss left, Mama finished off the ‘possum for us and then she
kinda freaked out a little. She’s no
sissie, so it wasn’t the ‘possum. No,
she started worrying me about the two bottles of bleach I’d taken out to the
orchard. Now, I don’t really know why I
took them out there…I guess I could have used them to clean up the ‘possum
mess, but I couldn’t get the labels off very well. I bit the handles, but nothing happened, so I
got bored with them. She kept smelling
my breath and my fur and talking to herself about dogs drinking bleach. I could have told her not to worry about it—I
would never drink bleach, I just wanted to know if white plastic tasted the same as black, but she
never really asked, so I kept that to myself. I guess that did cause a little unnecessary
worry for her. Ooops
Mama wasn't happy with the 'possum or the bleach bottles |
This week, she got
really mad. I mean….really, really
mad. She went all "Alpha-wolf" and
screamed and hollered…she even threw a few things. If you heard some sonic boom the other
morning, yeah, that was Mama yelling at me for destroying her Brussels sprouts
plants. Ooops
I really don’t know WHY she gets
all worked up like this. She’s got
thousands of these little bits of dirt with tiny plants in them that she’s
always playing with…didn’t anyone teach her to SHARE? I’ve seen her dump them out plenty of times…how
did she know I wasn’t trying to help? Oh…yeah…I
dumped them in the driveway. (I took a few to the orchard for good
measure) And then I rolled on them. I ate a few too…because I love
brassicas. You know they’re really
healthy and good for you,right?
Anyway, she lost it…big time. I think she threatened my life. Should I let someone know about this?
Anyway, she lost it…big time. I think she threatened my life. Should I let someone know about this?
After a little
while, she seemed to calm down. She got
some more black plastic trays (man, I wish I had her endless supply of that
stuff) and started over again. She told
me that I should be thankful she didn’t kill me. The Boss also told me I should be thankful he
didn’t get a hold of me after that incident. Later, she said that the situation
wasn’t as dire as she first thought…but, she was still mad at me. I just don’t
understand the two of them sometimes.
I do feel bad when she gets so mad |
Mama keeps saying…”heisjustapuppyheisjustapuppyheisjustapuppyheisjustapuppyheisjustapuppy….”
She says it's her new mantra. I don’t know what a mantra is, but I’m pretty sure that it’s going a long way to saving my big, fluffy tail, so mantra away, Mama. But, aren’t you supposed to put an “ohm” in there somewhere?
So, today I’m thankful
for Mama’s new mantra (whatever it is). ...and here’s hopin’ she
always sees me as a puppy!
-Gus
dEER afa-wuff,
ReplyDeletei wuZ aLL exiTED wUN day And suked ON ONE of moMMee's pills. boy didd shee Get MADD!!!!
i doN"t knows why she Eats them . tHAY just mAD me all wOBBLee on MY paws. yoo shud
leT GUss LIK sum oF yor pills. If HE is wobbled onHiz paws, he Won't eatYoR bruKLee. LOV, JOSepHINE. PPS. i lik to EAT PlasTIC to, AND I liK to SWalow strING
Dear Josephine,
DeleteThank you for taking the time to comment.
I will make a note of your advice. But, I'm afraid a wobbly Gus would still be a hungry Gus...and he would still get himself in trouble.
You really shouldn't swallow string. You'll get yourself all tangled up inside. Maybe you should try catnip (I've heard that it is totally non-addictive)
Your comment made me LOL!
-me
You should think about writing a book sometime. If I can do it, I know you can as well. Great story!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Mark!
DeleteA book is definitely on my bucket list. But, I have NO idea how or when...or even WHAT I'd actually write about.
Hi Barbara (aka Afa-Wuff?) Whoops, I leave Josephine alone with my computer for ten minutes and look what happens! Loved the story. You really are an excellent writer. Hope you have a super fun and successful Market Day tomorrow. Wish I could be there! And remember, he'sjustapuppy! He'll grow out of it in two years -three at the max ;)
ReplyDeleteHey Maureen!
DeleteThanks for the comments.
I want you to know I replied to Josephine. Honestly, that message made me laugh so hard! I think I startled the chickens. (I was working outside...okay, I was reading my mail while I was supposed to be working)
I wish you could visit the Market, too. It's a great time, although it is somewhat tiring (all that being cheerful early in the morning).
I know the puppy stage doesn't last forever (thankfully) Ellie chewed things up until she was about two, (she's almost 5) now she's the best dog we've ever had (except for her "blonde" moments) She is a very empathetic animal and will sit and comfort for the longest time.
Have a great weekend!