October sunrise |
Sometimes I think...
I just don’t do enough around here.
I must work harder…make an effort to succeed.
I should do more
here on the farm. Plant more seeds, be
more organized, work a little harder…
I really need to get some focus.
If I was seriously committed…I would work dawn to dusk and
then some…EVERY day!
If I was a real
farmer… I wouldn’t even think of taking a break!
Maybe I should learn to apply myself. Perhaps I ought to put
a whole lot more effort into this venture!
moth on hoophouse |
Nope.
No way.
Let’s just face facts.
I waste time. I waste
a LOT of time. …and ya know what? I don’t really care. …and I’m not planning on changing. (for the
record, the Boss is in absolute total agreement)
There are no timeclocks in our little paradise here on the
hill. It’s been more than 25 years since
I “clocked in” anywhere and I haven’t missed it at all! (although that mental calculation made me feel more than a little old)
While there are times when we work incredibly hard, there
are also times when we revel in the opportunity to do absolutely nothing at
all. Those empty spaces allow us to
re-charge and enable us to work through situations that require that we give
way more than 100% effort.
Squeekie catching a mouse |
I waste time when I pet the cats and dogs, when I stand in
awe at the sunrise or sunset, when I watch the cat capture a mouse, and when I
take countless photos of things that happen routinely. But those "wasted" moments grant me a
sense of peace and wonder and the desire to persevere in the face of adversity.
I know I could be working when I am standing outside for 10
minutes trying to get THE shot. But,
sometimes that photo is amazing.
Sometimes that photo touches someone else, teaches them something, or
reminds them of something pleasant.
Occasionally, I get lost on a rabbit trail of research, when
I really should be doing something else.
But, sometimes that rabbit trail is exactly what was needed to resolve a
thorny issue.
I realize that when I sit down at the computer to send an
email or silly message to someone that I could be doing something “really
productive”, but sometimes that message soothes the heart of one of my fellow
humans. Sometimes, it grants a much-needed smile to an aching heart.
Sometimes, when I should be working on a project, I get
side-tracked by texting/talking with one of my kids or friends. The projects can wait… people can’t.
A couple of years ago, I found out just how very
unpredictable and incredibly fragile life is.
While it was not my own “near death” experience, it was too close for
comfort and it had a profound impact. I’d always been incredibly goal-oriented
and a slave to my list-making. Never again will I assume that tomorrow will
just be another day. For that matter, I cannot even assume there will BE a
tomorrow. Life comes with absolutely no guarantees.
So…I’m wastin’ time.
Taking pictures, writing notes, reading about interesting things, doing
a little blogging, and yes…sending those silly Facebook messages.
2012 garlic crop has sprouted! |
Don’t worry; I get all my work done! (although I KNOW I could do more) and I still
have my OCD moments when I’m making a million lists and freaking out that
NOTHING ever gets done…but most of the time...
I’m so thankful to have
time to waste!
For I am fairly certain that when I get to the end of my
days, I’m pretty sure I won’t be thinking…"man, I REALLY should have planted
more cabbage!"
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